tylertiger

I stole this from cassigail so please forgive me, but I thought it wass cute and I am all about getting to know people better this holiday season.

[ ] I am shorter than 5'4".
[X] I think I'm ugly sometimes.
[ ] have many scars.
[X] I tan easily.
[ ] I wish my hair was a different color.
[X] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[X] I have a tattoo.
[X] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I had braces.
[X] I wear glasses.
[X ] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
[X] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ] I have more than 2 piercings.
[ ] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[X] I have freckles.

FAMILY
[X] I've sworn at my parents.
[ ] I've run away from home.
[ ] I've been kicked out of the house.
[X] My biological parents are together.
[ ] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[X] I want to have kids someday.
[X] I've had children.
[ ] I've lost a child.

EMBARRASSMENT
[ ] I've slipped out a "lol" in a spoken conversation.
[X] Disney movies still make me cry.
[X ] I've peed from laughing.
[X] I've snorted while laughing.
[X] I've laughed so hard I've cried.
[X] I've glued my hand to something
[ ] I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[X] I've had my trousers rip in public.

RELATIONSHIPS
[ ] I'm single.
[X] I'm in a relationship.
[ ] I'm engaged.
[ X] I'm married.
[X ] I've gone on a blind date.
[ ] I've been the dumpee more than the dumper.
[X] I miss someone right now.
[X] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ X] I've cheated in a relationship.
[ ] I've gotten divorced.
[X] I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
[ ] I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
[X] I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
[X] I've kept something from a past relationship.

SEXUALITY
[ X] I've had a crush on someone of the same sex.
[ X] I've had a crush on a teacher.
[X] I am a cuddler.
[ X] I've been kissed in the rain.
[X] I've hugged a stranger.
[X] I have kissed a stranger.

HONESTY
[X] I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't.
[X] I've done something I promised myself I wouldn't.
[ ] I've snuck out of my house.
[X] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[ ] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[X] I've cheated while playing a game.
[X] I've cheated on a test.
[ ] I've been suspended from school.

BAD TIMES
[X] I've consumed alcohol.
[ X] I regularly drink.
[ ] I can't swallow pills.
[X ] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem.
[X] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression.
[X ] I shut others out when I'm upset.
[X] I take anti-depressants.
[ ] I *have* anorexic or bulimic *tendencies* or have EDNOS*tendencies*.
[ ] I've slept an entire day when I didn't need it.
[ ] I've hurt myself on purpose.
[ ] I'm addicted to self harm.
[X ] I've woken up crying.

Okay so I have a couple of questions (that goes unanswered by the FAQs) probably more applicable to people who aren't in a LTR, however if you are and you have something to contribute, then obviously feel-free! :-)

If you're sleeping someone for the first time, would you find it to be a turn off if they asked for guidance in any way?! And by "guidance" I mean questions like "Do you like that?" or "What do you want me to do?" or "How do you want me to get you off?" or "Would you like me to suck harder?" etc.

Do you automatically give some form of guidance when you're sleeping with someone new?! For instance, my penis is extremely insensitive, so I like a bit of teeth when someone goes down on me...now a far as I'm aware teeth is generally considered a big NO NO in sex. So I'd always tell a guy when he's sucking me off "Use some teeth!" Also, I'm fairly noisy in bed, so I always make some agreeable sound when he does something I like. What do you do, if anything, to give guidance?! What do you find to be the most subtle, but effective, way of getting someone to help you get whatcha want?!

Any information/opinions on this would be helpful. I'm focusing mostly on the beginning of a sexual relationship, however it would be interesting to know about people who've spent a long time with the one person!? Do you just come right out and say whatever you're thinking....or do you, as a couple, come up with your own signals?!

Thanks in advance!

So, i've been dating this man for 5 months. he's terrific. first of all, i'm a 20 year old woman, he's 40. alright so here goes, there's two parts.

side note: he's naturally less affectionate than i am. this had been hurting me because it made me feel undesirable, unloved, etc. i finally told him about it, and he was great and understanding, and changed his behavior in a matter of minutes. he just hadn't realized that it was as important to me as it was because i never communicated it to him until this past weekend. communication rocks, and he certainly met me more than halfway with this issue right away.

part one-
he tends to cum early and often cums before he's even inside of me. when we have sex he often stops in the middle many times to stop himself from cumming and try to pace himself. i asked him if he still enjoys sex with me because of this problem and he said "yes and no." he likes having sex with me, but it frustrates him to not just go with the flow and be in the moment because hes constantly trying to stop himself from cumming early.

part two-
he has a lower sex drive than i do. i'm guessing because of his age and also because of a medical condition he has that requires him to take a lot of medication and also makes him tired often. i expressed this to him, that i wished we had more sex. he told me he'd do whatever i wanted him to do, perhaps take supplements, to increase his libido or even go to a sex therapist to figure something out.




so, questions:

1) what has worked out the best for you guys that have had problems with premature ejaculation? is it even fixable? -sigh-

2) is there anything that can increase male sex drive (such as supplements or anything else you can think of)? i know viagra isn't good for you, but does it increase horniness or does it only help with erectile dysfunction? because he doesnt have problems with getting it up.

any other general suggestions? thanks :)

So....

What turns your partner on in bed?

Just a personal thing, I'm curious.

The more detailed, the better.

:)

Done here.

New stuff....
Fishyboner.com.

For now.

A friend of mine, innocent_man, posted something this morning that really got me thinking. He was talking about driving around town in the wee hours of the morning. His words are probably much more poetic than mine will ever be, but it got me thinking about the times where I use to do the same thing.

I didn't always live in Ohio and I didn't always work a 9-5 job. I wasn't always tied down to the family life I have grown used to. I often found myself cruising the streets of both Detroit, MI and Louisville, KY at the wee hours of the morning lost in thought. I would either be coming from or going to work or just out for a drive. Those were the times that I could clear my head. Get my life back together. Put the chaos on my head back in it's place. Back then I wasn't on medication for my bi-polar or my depression. I wasn't drinking to dull the pain. I had my fair share of problems - abusive relationships, failing this class or that class, no money to pay bills. It was those late night/early morning drives that put me back right with the world.

So it is now that I wonder why I don't go on those rides more often. What makes me stay at home instead of grabbing the keys and roaming the streets? Is it the child I worry that I don't spend enough time with? The husband that loves me so much? I also wonder if maybe part of the reason why I can't sort the craziness out is because I don't take those rides. I don't take enough time away. That I am trying to hard to be what every one else wants me to be. What every one needs me to be. That I forgot how to be who I need to be.

Maybe tonight I'll take one of those rides...

So this person and I have been together on and off for almost two years now. Not “exclusive” at the moment, and I’m not sure why that’s relevant in any way, but I’m a little uncertain with the way to conduct these “questions”.

Anyways! To put it in blatant terms, we have a very strong love/hate relationship. He is the most influential person I have ever met but/and (I feel if I use but it implies the following is a problem) we are very, very different in our perspectives which has caused a lot of tension in our relationship before. However, we acknowledge there is some undeniable bond that keeps bringing us back together in some way. Yeahyeahyeah… during sex he is usually (and I use this term loosely) dominate and I submissive. I enjoy being strangled during intercourse (har har) and he was uneasy about the idea at first but loves it now. I know for a fact this goes beyond sexual pleasure, in the sense he probably thinks sometimes, “damn, I wish I was strangling her”. Okay, so that’s not what I think he is word for word thinking, but what I mean to say it’s a good way for him to vent his anger. He is a very aggressive person outside of the bedroom and I’m fully aware of this. (No, he’s not abusive towards me in any way). Recently he said he wants to tie me up and have me squirm around while he does things to me. Now I’m all for this, I’m practically ready to forget about my thesis and drive over right now.

FUNDAMENTAL QUESTION: Is it unusual to participate in sexual scenarios knowing the person is vicariously living through the act of that sexual persona to act out what they would probably like to do to you in real life at times? Most wordy question ever, I realize, but I’m sure you guys could pose it better and then answer.

Personally, I could care less. I’m just interested in what other people have to say

I've been watching this community for a bit. little intro. im 20 and i'm in a 7month relationship with the love of my life. sex is great except when we are busy and cant do it haha



1. Question, i'm very active, i do rowing yoga and pilates so i dont really get tired or out of breath but my bf smokes and not long ago his job went from construction to maintenance. Hes not like getting fat or anything, hes actually getting thinner and losing muscle... He's a country boy and isn't really into going to the gym, he went once with me but i think its the first and last time he will. Plus he doesnt really have time. i dont wanna just tell him he's getting too thin and should work out..but since i met him i think he lost about 10lbs. he weighs the same as me and im 5'6 and hes 6'2 i dont really know how to go about telling him that i would want him to start at least doing weight and maybe a bit of cardio since he gets out of breath really easily



just something funny
2. i remember one time i was on top and my boyfriend was moving too and he started moving in a circular motion and i noticed that his mouth and chin were moving in a circular motion too and it was so funny and i just started laughing. but i stopped myself. he still does it but i try not to laugh. its just cute


UPDATE:
I convinced him to come to rowing practice tomorrow for weight training :)

Heyyy hopefully you guys remember me (and my first post) because things are still not working out. I need more advice..
Recap of my problem: My sex drive is apparently way higher than my boyfriend's in recent times and I'm starting to feel like he doesn't
want me anymore...its really hurting my self-esteem. He always tells me i'm soo beautiful/smokin hot and makes sexual remarks etc. throughout the day but we DONT HAVE SEX !! Its been a year and a half and we have sex about 2-3 times a week usually in the morning and its completely passive and lasts 3 minutes. I cant keep doing this I feel rejected all the time.
So in my previous post I made a decision from all of the feedback that i was going to TALK to him about it. Welll......
Turns out i'm really bad at bringing things up and/or talking about issues like this. I'm just to afraid of what will happen. I don't want to talk to him about it and then have him "faking" that hes interested in sex or just doing it to make me happy. I want him to CRAVE me naturally y'know?
I would like some advice regarding how to go about this "talk" <OR> what else I can do to get his attention (mentally and physically) and start having more sex again. Mabye my problem is that I always try to initiate sex at night when we're in bed/winding down? But we are apart for most of the day so what else can i do? Pull him into the bedroom after we walk in the door at 6pm?

Note: He's been working really hard at his job lately..longer hours and doing classes/tests in order to move up and get a raise etc. so I feel bad trying to "force" him into having sex with me if hes really that exhausted @ the end of the day. WHAT TO DO?!???

-helplessly horny

Please bare with me as this could get lengthy...

It is no secret that my husband and I have gone through our share of troubles lately. We have discussed options such as an open marriage, a separation, divorce and even tried an open marriage for a brief period of time. I have been through my own share of issues having been diagnosed with bipolar over the summer and dealing with medication change after medication change. Still months later things still aren't great or even good. Both my husband and I are just making due. Depression has basically ruled our household and the only time the other one seems to be somewhat happy is when they are out with someone else.

There is the background story. So last night I was rather down in the dumps after a rather lengthy therapy session which sounded a lot like the past year's worth of therapy which basically amounted to shit or get off the pot. So I came home depressed and had to explain to my husband why. By the end of the night we were talking rationally about it. This topic is usually met with a lot of fighting, yelling and screaming. Last night was very rational and I ended up falling asleep wrapped in his arms crying. Normally, it would have ended with each of us on our respective sides of the bed as far away as possible.

So how does this relate to a missing person? This morning I remembered a conversation I had with a good friend of mine. He was telling me I hadn't been good for a long time and it started before I married my husband. It started when my best friend was killed and I haven't been the same since. That was when I realized I have been trying to replace that friend for the past six years with every man who has been in my life. No one can. No one ever will. So I shared this revelation with my husband and all I could say was that he knew, he always knew. He told me he loved me. He hugged me and let me cry.

So I have been broken for the last six years. I have been trying to fill a hole that will never be filled and I don't know how to move on from that point. So is the missing person my friend who passed away over six years ago or is it me?

Is it just me or does nearly every post i see coming in to this community say :

"Hey! Heres my problem with my male partner...his cock is absolutely huge by the way...any ideas how to solve my problem?"

Not that there is anything wrong with that, i am just kind of curious what people are viewing as 'huge' these days. I, personally, dont like giant cocks all that much. The length is hard for me to 'relax' in to 99% of the time...

Anyway, what is the largest penis youve been with? Really, how do i phrase that...(If you know) Length, and possibly girth would be awesome but who automatically measures that when they whip out a tape measure? I know i dont.What is your ideal sized penis? based on previous experiences or wants.

My current man partner is the biggest ive been with. Hes 8 inches and of average thickness which im very happy with except i could maybe knock an inch off of it. He is 6'4" though, so his size actually looks average due to his height.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJt_1AVPPoE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz69T8rvfqk

I had a baby 3 months ago and ever since sex was okay'd by the doc we've had problems with getting him in. I dunno if the doc stitched me up too much or what but I'm tellin you this is worse now than when he first took my virginity a lil over a year ago. Is there ANYTHING we can do to speed this process along?

Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com

Hi everyone,

My boyfriend and I have been together for over four years. I consider our relationship, sex and otherwise, to be really happy and healthy.

I know that my boyfriend looks at porn, although not frequently. While I used to feel insecure about this, I've come a really long way and it doesn't bother me now. However, I've noticed once or twice that when I log onto my computer (which he uses every once in a while since he doesn't have his own) and hit the drop down box to go to a website I visit frequently (online banking or Amazon or whatever) the history has been cleared. It doesn't happen every time he uses the computer.

Today, noticing my history had been cleared, I hit the drop down bar for Google searches and found three different searches for very general porn - nothing specific and really nothing to bother me. However, I feel sad about the fact that he feels he has to clear the history after watching porn. He'll be here again in a few hours and I know I should say something, but I'm not quite sure what.

Obviously, I'm not going to fly off the handle and be upset about it; I don't want him to feel like he has to hide these things from me. I want to express that although it isn't my favorite thing ever, I'm not going to be mad at him for watching porn. I also want to express that it makes me feel...sad? hurt? that he is secretive about it.

Ideas? Thanks :]

EDITED FOR UPDATED- -
Thank you all for the helpful comments. I decided against saying anything to him about it because I trust him entirely and really don't mind that he watches porn. Not to mention that it's just his personal business. After considering it further, I think it's just the inconvenience of a blank history that bothers me most! Again, thanks for the comments :]

out of curiousity, how many ladies here have been insulted and or threatened by a guy because you had sex with him once, possibly twice, and then never again? Ive been accused lately of being an alcoholic and having my p.o. Called to tell on my past drug abuse and self harm, what a p.o. Would care about the self harm, im not sure, lol. I used to be somewhat fairly sexually active but have cut down a lot this year for varying reasons, but having guys out right insult me over it was a little hard to take at the time, but now i find it amusing since i currently have a real boyfriend again :) just wondered people's opinions on actually being mildly threatened over not wanting to have sex with that person anymore. What did he seriousily think he was going to get out of that? Men, excuse me..boys..can be so confusing and mean sometimes.

I've searched through the memories list, but I couldn't find anything specifically addressing my personal problem.

My current boyfriend and I have been sleeping together for about 3 weeks now. There was a lot of sex during the first week, but then it slowly began to decline. The reason: he revealed to me that he has a very low sex drive. It's a sensitive topic for him, and he's actually pretty embarrassing for him. He admitted that he has not always been this way, which leads me to believe that it's at least somewhat psychological in nature (he's had some interesting experiences with past relationship: girl who cheated on him twice, a control freak, a sex addict).

I told him that I never wanted him to have sex with me unless he wanted (ie: not give in just to "make me happy"), and I don't intend to go against my word on that topic. However, it really is beginning to drive me crazy because my sex drive is insanely high (especially given the fact that we're new partners) and I am always horny and he's...always not horny. I don't want to be mad with him, but sometimes I can't help but be a little frustrated.

He says that he likes to turn me on and do stuff with me, but I guess it's almost awkward just to outright ask for oral sex (not to mention the slightly "unsexy" factor). However, I understand that beggars can't be choosers, so...I'm working on getting over that.

My question is this: am I doing the right thing by letting him call the shots regarding sex? Should I encourage him to talk about it more even though he's slightly uncomfortable with the topic? I feel like I'm always treading on thin ice in this area and I have no idea how to handle myself.

So, after 11 months of being silly and unsure, I'm finally in a committed relationship with this guy, and it's amazing. We have everything in common, and he's smart and funny and just so good to me. I'm so happy to have him in my life.

Fast forward, we're horny as fuck and we want to bang like bunnies whenever we're around each other. That's not a big deal for me, cuz while I'm not a virgin, and with the one slip up in January, I've not had sex in 2 years. He's never had sex. He's fooled around, but never all the way, ya know?

We are getting hot and heavy, and we did have sex, but he's really nervous and has trouble...getting there, if you know what I mean. I really enjoy being with him, and I can tell that he's insecure about a lot of things, like his weight (which doesn't bother him me in the least) or about messing up in bed...which....he has no problem with at all hahahha. he's amazing.

but what can i do to him out? I personally

for the last year or two i have had an impossible time being turned on by my boyfriend. i dread having sex more than anything. it hurts and i'm always stressed out and tense. it also doesn't help that i'm fairly tight (and not wet) and that he's very much above average in size. i hate that the entire time we're doing it i'm just hoping that it's going to be over soon.

i become tense the moment we're undressed and no matter how long foreplay lasts it doesn't do any good because the entire time i'm thinking about how it's going to hurt. i've tried to take my mind off of it, but nothing i'm doing is helping. even with lubricant it can still be unpleasant.

my boyfriend has been very patient, but it visibly upsets him. whenever he tries to put it in i tend to yell and scooch away. he thinks it's his fault, but it really isn't. i'm madly in love with him and i'm incredibly attracted to him, so why can't we have good sex!? why can't i WANT to have sex?? for the first two years we were together it was amazing and then out of nowhere (i've never been on birth control pills or anything) it just started to be a painful, painful chore for me.

tips? advice? anything? :(